Twas the night before Mall Maddness! Black friday and "..revolutionizing the means of consumption."

The Muzak was piping "i'm dreaming of a white X-mas" ever so gently over the nearly 100 acres of abandoned mall space. Instead of the stammer of thousands of feet and pandemonium there was only the sound of a million gallos of water cascading over the rocks of "The Falls" shopping mecca in south Dade County (Miami) Florida.

I was meeting a friend and we were desperately trying to find a coffee house that was open or any place for that matter, but to no avail. All was quiet. All was closed on Thanksgiving Day...this day before "Black Friday"; the biggest shopping day of the year. A well oiled capitalistic American phenomenon. Where national holiday turns into a consumer holiday. Though in my opinion, its celebrants are the corporations raking it all in. More on that later.

At the Apple Store, little nano's (the new mini I-pod like music players) sat glowing in the palm of a gingerbreadman's hands. A sultry 2-D Victoria Secret model peered out of another window sporting little else than a Santa Hat made me wonder if they "photo-shopped" the hat onto an old ad campaign to save a few bucks on the window display and maximize the profits on the "unmentionables"? Hey, i'm a reporter, and observer.....and so i observed for a few minutes. Hmmm, definately wasn't on her head when the original photo was taken! But hey nice frilly lacy thingie, wonder if they make that in white lace...oh um Sorry, where was i.

Oh yes, so my friend and i decided, lets meet at the Mall, see what's brewing. should be curious. I'm glad i did so, for its calmness and "high noon" abandonment inspired me to observe the opposite the next day and trek to Dadeland Mall to partake and experience (with new eyes) this most joyous gift grabbing and credit card swiping holiday. So for those that might be in shock right now, especailly those that kmow i hate malls; Cesar A. Becerra willfully went and visited Dadeland Mall on the day after Thanksgiving.....and (thankfully) lived to tell the tale. Trust me, this was not an easy task, nor was i ecstatic to be there.

First challenge as u can imagine was the parking situation. Which was horrendous! No surprize here. This is Miami, and at the mall on top of that. I wont bore u with the details or give precious space to describing finding a spot. In all it took about 45 minutes to actually find a spot, on the roof of a 4 story parking structure that was as devoid of life and good design (then again most parking garages are) as they come. You'd think that if the lifeblood of transporting yur goods is attached to the automobile then they'd atleast make an effort to beautify, enlarge (as bad i hate to promote larger parking areas - but the narrow turns are just hellatious) and make parking a more pleasant experience.

Actually, this brings up a good point associated with the book i just read by George Ritzer called Enchanting A Disenchanted World; Revolutionizing the Means of Consumption. By the way, this is the holy grail of books to read if u want to see "how far the rabbit hole goes" (line that Morpheus tells Neo in The Matrix) in relation to how malls work.

One day this very issue of parking will be used to lure more customers into the mall. Some mall developer will (or already has) design a more pleasant parking experience that will make the desicion to go visit their mall as opposed to going to an older one where parking is still a hassle.

This phenomenon as Mr. Ritzer points out is the very reason that all malls and other "cathedrals of consumption" are almost at the moment they get built or newly renovated or expanded....are completely obsolete. The customers/consumers eventually grow tired of the very thing that brought them into that store. Once cutting edge, a new concept grows old. And corporate America, particularly mall developers have become very keen at realizing that they constantly have to out do themselves just to "keep em comin". Unfortunately they have to spend million of dollars each year, use up countless more natural resources, sometimes even cut down green areas....all to bring us a new shopping experience!

Several case in points. And surprizingly "ripped" from the pages of his books were details found particularly at Dadeland on the day after Thanksgiving when i visited;

The children's area was bustling with a soft play area and comfortable seating for adults- in fact hotel lobby like couches...COUCHES! for the adults to rest and relax.....so that, so that... parents dont get burned out by kids crying, getting cranky. So that...they will stay longer in the mall....not to admire mall architecture or buy Cinnebuns...but to spend more money in the stores! Buy more products, be exposed and plant more seeds of interest in other products to buy on the next trip.

This day was so important that the mall felt they did not want to take a chance on little Sue or Bobby having a melt-down so they hired three costumed faries (best description i can muster, anyhow one of them had wings - please see link below for rest of photos of my mall excursion) to hand out balloon animals to the (soon to be "formerly cranky") kids. Mission accomplished, little Bobby has his balloon and mom can go buy more stuff to put under the tree.

The only area where sunlight peeked in was in the giant food court. This is by design so dont be fooled. In the land of malls they'd love u to loose track of time soo... around the main stores u will be in an environment where u will forget what time it is, (i.e. no sunlight) because yu really cant see outside...much like the Las Vegas casino environment. This is of course to lull u into thinkin u've been there only a few minutes, meanwhile 8 hours have gone by and the sun has long since set. But in the food court, they'd like u to be in an environment to re-fresh yur batteries. Be around nature. There will generally be an indoor palm or two. And of course lots of caffeine to get u thru the next part of the shopping experience.

There are no readily seen or centraly based clocks anywhere in the mall. This of course goes hand in hand with the whole loosing an entire day looking at gadgets, clothing and other related tcotchkies. The only clock i did find was at Macy's but thta didn't count cuz it was merely a decorative one projected on the floor, plugging away at the biological shopping clock of 24, 23, 22...days till X-mas! And anyway it had the wrong time so it represented a double whamy of misdirection.

Every year as we all know and hear, there is a major toy that comes out that everybody just has to have. And this year its the X-box. Only someone was crafty (or sinister) enough not to manufacture too many cuz there has been a "run on the bank"for those white boxed little suckers. Now i'm told thru the rumor mill that there is another version in another color but my inbox is full right now and truthfully i could care less. That's not the case with the throngs of folks snapping these babies up. You just cant get them. Anywhere. And if u do, you'll pay - from what i hear on a recent ebay auction - nearly 5,000 clams to bring one home. Hello folks they sell for only $350 bucks!

Well "Fernando", an industrious Cuban American student i found at Dadeland that day understands this law of supply and demand quite well and was willing to take advantage of this situation so he put up his own X-box store. Right in the middle of the mall where even those small boutique "carts" can fetch $3,000 a month in rent!

But Fernando was smarter than that. Fernando only had one X-box. So it didn't make sense to pay Dadeland Mall $3,000 dollars for a space to sell his one X-box. So Fernando, clever boy that he is, took advantage of the mass pandemoneum of Black Friday, the day after Turkey Day, and he plopped down a small white sign Fernando had printed on his HP Printer (maybe less than 5 cent investment, plus the $350 x-box) that said "X-Box, $1,000" and innocently placed it at his feet. Fernando, the rebel X-box store owner for a day, turned a $650 dollar profit from a small white box that everybody "just has to have!"

Well after my 3 hours at the mall, i just "had to go". And began making my way out of Dadeland Mall with a profit of 2 sample bites of a pretzel from Anie Q's, (i didn't pay for it so i'll just estimate its street value of maybe 10 cents) one toothpick sized bite of garlic chicken (again a free sample probably worth a quarter) from Panda King and the knowledge that it is indeed possible to enter one of the most profitable "cathedrals of consumption" without spending a penny. And that lesson is indeed....."priceless" in every sense and irony of the word.

Cesar, Signing off
Currently in Atlanta
Finishing Marji's Move


Notes on PHOTOS; here are some captions for above photos, sorry i have not been able to figure out how to put them under photos so bear with me.

1. A bemused (think that is a word) or stunned husband waits for wife, thinking, "i could be watching football now!"

2. Lots of encouraging signs that make it seem that this is the only day EVER that u can buy this much crap for these insane prices.

3. Hoards of Folks walking down Dadeland Mall, one of the most successful malls in America. Located in South Dade County (Miami) over the years the mall has undergone several radical transformations in line with the phenomenon that the customer gets bored - or rather his/her attention will go to another mall with some new fangled gimick - really quickly!

4. Macy's clock. Wrong time. Meant to lull u into thinking u've only been inside 5 minutes...meanwhile ur kids are at home starving and yu've more than blown ur "nest egg"

5. Me at Brookline/Brooks, whatever that damn store is that sells all those gadgety devices that end up in my garage sales. In anycase this massage chair retails for just about $2,000. This line of chairs -once just a bit player in the stores inventory - has become so popular and so popular that the company that manufactures them actually bought BOUGHT the actual retail store that sells them...hook line and sinker! Unbelievable. Are we that stressed out that we need to simultaneously sit down -in itself its own relaxing replenishing excercize - and be massaged at the same time!

6. Another sign. Buy, but buy right now please!

7. Notice the palms and sunlight in the food court area. Food courts are meant to curb ur appetite....so you dont....Leave the MALL. So u can turn around and buy more stuff. PERIOD. They are not a convenience to the customers they are a convenience to the stores inside the mall and their cash registers!

8. This poor guy was taking a nap. But wait upon closer inspection notice this is not yur typical park or mall bench, nope....this is a hotel lobby like plush couch. Hmmmm, someone wants yu to be refreshed quickly so you can.....yu guessed it....SHOP, SHOP, SHOP!

9. PANTY RAID! Always wanted to say that. And here it is. Obviously the girls that hit this stand were a pack of wild teenagers with absolutely no manners. But its Black Friday, who cares, lets leave everything a mess. In the end, these big sales turn people into animals....in a way, if u dont get ur favorite pink panties...the world will end!

10. Ahhh yes the joys of finding a spot to park.

11. Who are these girls. I mean, we should have a contest to try and name or describe what it is they are representing. Mall faries? Pink boa like butterflies? You tell me. Ahh but there purpose is solid. Make those cranky kids forget they were cranky, sleepy or God forbid....bored! Kids....c'mon its the mall, lets get with the program. This is supposed to be fun. Mommy and daddy gotta shop!

12. Another poster plus it matches the ad campaign in the local paper. Actually a national campaign. This was after all an unofficial national holiday!

13. "Everyone has a Gift to Give" What does this mean? Note or question to Macy's. Hypothetically speaking... even though yu might have a gift to give, should yu really give it? What if u dont want to give a gift, or dont have one to give, or opt not to give to each and every person u know? Just asking.

14. More folks jamming the isles at Macy's inside Dadeland Mall.

15. "Fernando" our rougue non-renting rebel X-box vendor!